is it a bad sign that i now think of my run-ins with cops as "skill building seminars"?
um, yeah. i think it is.
All I'm saying, is that being compared to a Muppet is not the end of the world.
OK...I gotta go get strawberry short cake cakes and knee pads
And you kept hanging up and calling back because you thought I wasn't greeting you properly.
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
Also, I found out tonight a major plus for being female is you can accidentally call the hot bartender sweet tits and she won't get mad.
It's all good, I've hated people for lesser reasons than being my ex boyfriend's favorite pro athlete of all time
I just spent 20 mins in the shower washing n rewashing my body to get rid of stripper. I even loofa'd my face.
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
Not gonna make it. My ovaries are playing laser tag
We hooked up for a while and on his way out he high fived me and said "stay weird"
SShout out to Barney the Dinosaur for teaching me how to sing the ABCs backward. I just scored a free pitcher.
Sorry I've been a slutty nightmare this week
Thank you for stroking my rage monster tonight.
Being single again makes you realize how guys can go from licking your asshole one night to never texting you again
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