why did i wake up with a kid named Raphael in my bed this morning?
I dont know but you did call last night to tell me you found the last ninja turtle
You smell like stripper and shame
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
So he handed us the weed then asked us if we needed any papers. And she goes "i dont know what that means, do we need to sign something?"
woke up to the trail of sugar cubes leading to my bed........was i that uncooperative last night
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
She said just put your tongue in there and don't linger. I have other things to do.
I woke up at 3am, my head in a toilet, still at the kegger, wearing a random cowboy hat.
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
She told me "I think I'm going to puke tonight" a few seconds later she said smiling"I can't wait!"
I'm trying to behave my vagina this week so I can at least pretend I'm honoring the sanctity of marriage
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
I woke up with what has to be a whole pack of smarties loose in my bra. Was that your fault?
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
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