jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
Don't make me out to be the bad guy. You practically MADE me cum on your food.
Just because we buy weed together doesn't mean were a couple
Since when does sleeping with your RA not result in free meal swipes? I feel so tricked...
you started putting condoms on anything with a point, then you were yelling at the lamp for using your last condom...
It was all cool until he grabbed my vag and started screaming: THIS IS MINE.
He got punched in the face, dropped his laptop down a flight of stairs, and broke his roommate's lava lamp, getting all the toxic lava goo everywhere. This is why we don't let him get drunk. And yet here we are.
I don't think we had sex because when I woke up he was still wearing the chicken suit.
Why would I send you a picture of it when I could just steal the gnome and put it in your bed with you? Admit it, he looks just like gnomeo!
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
I love you, but it's "shark week" I'll make it up to you with naked breakfast.
Going to dump some dried Xanax powder into some Mac and cheese. Can't think of a better way to avoid tasting it.
The cops spotted my on my walk of shame down the boardwalk and gave me a ride home. I'm starting to make a name for myself here.
I don't even have his number. I have his pants tho
Oh you mean the girl that gave me a black eye when I told her I liked her fake eyelashes?
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