just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
make sure i look cute passed out on the couch.
Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?
I think forcing your little sister to drink with you on a Wednesday when she has school the next day is the low point of alcoholism.
My neighbor just watched me eat a granola bar without pants, this is a whole new level of unemployed
By the taste of his semen he isnt vegetarian and therefore lied to me to take me home on a brighter note i stole his fondue set
My apartment smells like a lavender field inside of a giant bong.
Happy you have kids and I don't day!
Never should have deleted her from my facebook. My new girl is so much hotter than she is, I just want to passive aggressively rub it in her face
The minute he showed me his Mumford and sons tattoo is the minute i could literally feel my pussy dry up
It's has to do with my genitals. Don't ask.
He just showed up in boxer briefs and loafers with only his phone and condoms
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
I found condoms in the back yard from you and your boyfriend. My house isnt a motel
I just passed a lady driving with a cat in a sweater sitting on her lap with its paws on the steering wheel
Only you....
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