At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
Just did the walk of shame across state lines...milestone?
The only thing worse than listening to you two fuck all night was waking up and smelling bacon and there not being any left.
Fell into a man hole last night. I've been bleeding since 11pm. Got kicked out of the bar for being bloody.
I'm eating dry tortillas on a mattress without a sheet. and i thought my life would change after graduation.
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
you know you have a brother who cares when he hands you a piece of pizza before you pass out from too many bong hits
Hahahahahahhajahahahahajajjajahjahahajahahajajahahahajjajajahahjajajajajahahahajjjajajaahhahhahahahahahahahaha dominos taxi
It's really sad that I'm trying to calculate in my head the type of place to have dinner that's worth anal
This holiday season is going to be rough between people coming home for the holidays and the already regulars on my list I might have to clone my vagina to make sure I get everyone for all they are worth
Thought I was doing makeup today for a photo shoot for a short film. WRONG. Try I'm on the set for a Fucking Sci-Fi PORN.
Naked and Afraid: Hangover edition
three of my fingers are bleeding and the only thing on my phone rn is a google search of 'Allison Janney'
Randomize
