I'm fucking your sister right now.
You motherfucker
She's next.
He said he was from Mississippi and my vagina clamped shut like a frightened oyster
I'm at a party with that guy you made out with on new years. He remembers your name!
Springtime is officially here. I just used pool water to fill up the bong
and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
He fell asleep and they duct taped him to the floor. He's pissed.
this is why ugly people need low self esteem. it stops them from doing shit like this.
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
Im pretty sure that girl just said "Im taking you home even if your girlfriend has to come too." Why are we here again?
If I got everything I wanted in the world, I would have been forcing soup down your throat hours ago
I lost all interest the day she banged that guy in the Amazon parking lot. That's a special kinda whore.
your fucking longboard fell on me while we were having sex you fucking hipster
He ate me out while I was wearing a canada goose parka and a dress hand crafted by a seamstress from yellowknife. I came while watching the northern lights. Most arctic orgasm ever.
Just woke up beside some twink in a kilt.. how is your sunday going
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
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