brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
i got a blow job in the bathroom during intermission at the hockey game. i'm pretty sure i made Canada proud.
He just called shotgun on the way to the squad car.
He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.
So looks like I applied to adopt a dog last night. I'm completely ok with this
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
Now I can't say for certain but I'm 90 percent are I bathed myself with dog shampoo last night
also, am i correct in guessing that advertising the size of my hypothetical penis is a turnoff to him?
You've lost booty call privileges between the hours of 10pm and 8am.
I just ate your leftovers whilst watching Garfield and Friends. Thank you across the board.
Plus we had to have sex before the game because there is a good chance we won’t be speaking for the rest of the week. #ironbowl
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
You know something is wrong with your lifestyle when you have to clean easy Mac cheese powder off of your scale
at least it's not cocaine like last time
my dad just built a flame thrower.. you should probably get here
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