I'm too stoned for this. I'm Canadian.
as soon as you compare a person to an animal, all sexual interest is out the window
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
i hooked up with some kid with a broken arm and he wouldnt even let me sign his cast
I'm eating dry tortillas on a mattress without a sheet. and i thought my life would change after graduation.
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
You know its good night when theres makeup smears on the toilet seat
I know you`re my best friend, but when i wake up with this bad of a hangover and no memories of last night, i dont want to see your tits ad my background.
He just whispered "doors are weird" and then laughed so hard he fell down the stairs.
Blocking me on Facebook doesn't change the fact that you've had my penis in my mouth. So there's that.
I'm fucking sick of guys. I think I'm going to date myself. No drama. And I know I'll always put out.
I wish I could be the kind of drunk Bobbi is... She stumbles around outside at 4am with a broken high heel and babbling about rainbows and getting dick...
Pillow talk?
can't do it. no eye contact either.
Where have you been all my life
We told him to puke in the Denny's parking lot or we wouldn't be his friend anymore. So he did. He wasn't even drunk.
Randomize
