Her underwear doesnt even match. If youre going to be a face book whore at least have matching shit.
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
Bad news. I lost my teeth. Good news. I can still take a guy home sans teeth.
He just asked if I would make his black snake moan. Dating basketball players is not worth the glory
I left him a voicemail saying i went through with the abortion and he texts me back one thing... the bbm "phew" face. really?
Bro, I just want to tell you that I'm glad you got fired. I'm going to fuck your replacement.
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
He's such a gentleman. He didn't even ask why my bra was flung on the seat of my car. He just took my snow brush, pushed it onto the floor and said, "Let's go I'm hungry."
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
You should really trust me on this one. "hit it and quit it" might not be the best career move on your part...
Is it normal that every guy I hook up with tells me my hair is sexy as it's happening? Like that can't be normal
Not going to lie: not even the fact I'm wearing men's cargo pants can hide the fact I have an awesome ass.
Hey don't blame me, picking what flavor of condom to put on my dick is a very difficult selection process
Who in their right mind would frost a cake with their butt?
He only has one ball. it was like fucking a cyclops.
Randomize
