I want to make a zoo with you.
i got a mint flavored condom from wellness day...im kind of tempted to taste it
Just heard this lady walk by on her phone saying "did everyone orgasm?"
Somewhere between the 2 hours of sex and her urgently rushing to work she manged to steal all $329.33 in my jeans. Worst one night stand ever, she even took the pennies.
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
The best part of my day was getting high in the parking lot of the movie theater and taking pics in the photo booth with the caption "CONGRATULATIONS!" we geeked out because it congratulated us for getting high
think he just told me if I need to shit I should go outside.
The joke is on me because whale penis is forever in my search history.
Worth it.
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
Like my new perfume? It's a combination of Fireball, sex and bad decisions.
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
I know I say this every year but 2015 will be the year I finally have sex with David's sister
Congratulations! You can now legally do that thing you said you never do again!
THANKS! I'M SO EXCITED TO NOT DO THE THING
OMG YOU GO OUT AND NOT DO THAT THING, GIRL! I SUPPORT YOU 100%!!!
Drunk sex on a hardwood floor is never ever a good idea. Lesson learned.
I just ran into my psychology professor at Planned Parenthood she asked why I was there and I asked why she was there and it turns out we both had a scare.#bonding because of abortion.
Randomize
