I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
I woke up and my panties were thumbtacked to his wall. Out of my reach.
dude, that chick is coming to see me and stay for 2 nights. I'm hitting the 3rd in the trifecta of friends.
You're one hell of a depraved bastard dude, I'm borderline speechless. You officially win.
They all have matching tattoos so they're all official bffs. I love my life.
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
I pulled my bra out of my dress and handed it to my mom..at cocktail hour during the wedding.
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
We dropped so many bottles they would only give us plastic cups. We actually drank ourselves back to preschool.
This is going to be one of those "I can only do this high" classes
I'm at the hospital waiting for my sister to push out her kid. I think I'll roam the halls and shame all the teenage mothers.
He sent me a snap chat of his naked torso with cookies over his nipples. Like.... that does not make me want you homeboy.
Who are you to come into MY house and tell me when I can or cannot take my pants off?
I woke up just like any other Wednesday. Naked on the floor, hungover and covered head to toe in lube
slept with a 6'5 mountain man from Montana and then he played 'Girls Just Wanna Have Fun' on repeat..
I feel really sorry for my toilet right now
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