i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
I passed out in the cab. Woke up to the cabby yelling SIR SIR WE ARE AT THE TRAIN STATION!! SIRRRR!!
I think I gave almost everyone at that party the clap last night
I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
halloween is SO much better on drugs, why didn't anyone let us know about this when we were kids
I AM SAFE. EVERYTHING IS FOG. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED.
What is a foreign vacation of stupidity without some fake names?
I don't get hangovers. Except once. And there is a massively epic story behind that, involving so much alcohol I should have died, and 13 raw hotdogs.
I can't get over how you look like his sister and he wants to fuck you.
There is a check pinned to the wall at Connor's. It's a check I wrote for $1,000,000... To you. Clearly you made out well on St. Patrick's day. Thanks for being too shitfaced to remember to grab that.
its 3am and I'm taking a bubble bath, this is what taking a day off work at 30 looks like
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
Cant get off the floor. Need more beer. Send help.
There’s a special place in hell for tall guys with small dicks
This pandemic, it’s making everyone horny. I’ve got dick stashed all over town
Randomize
