Wow, you know I need to stop drinking alone when I pour my drink into my hand and offer it to my dog,
Two hours into move in day and the ambulance is here already.
I'm more impressed with the spaghetti smoothie at the present moment.
I always knew I'd be the first one with an STD
slow down on the beer.. we don't need another pentabong projectile hot dog incident
I don't know. I was also picked up by the doormen and held over the bar so I could do an upside down shot out of a bartenders tits.
The best part of my day was getting high in the parking lot of the movie theater and taking pics in the photo booth with the caption "CONGRATULATIONS!" we geeked out because it congratulated us for getting high
remind to leave next time the words "tequila" and "challenge" are shouted
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
I dont think ive ever had a drunk day betray me so hard before
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
The beer bottle was sticking out of your zipper and you shook it onto unsuspecting patrons
Do you think you can chase a shot with chicken soup?
It was like sex on an active volcano surrounded by the night sky and bloodhounds. And by that I mean it was nice.
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
Randomize
