he broke up with me while standing outside, half naked, waiting to fuck him. i feel like a leper right about now.
17 year olds will be the death of me.
could you please not use my mortar and pestal for its intended purpose? i just snorted cracked black pepper.
i told him i should keep a toothbrush at his house for after all the times i threw up there. he said yes but i wasnt getting a key to the apt
I pretty much threw up on him while he slept, I had one task today which was to wash the sheets that I threw up on and I turned them pink. I would leave me if I could
My prof gave me extra credit for drawing a ninja on my paper and writing "ninja will up my grade"
I'm off the liquor
You're forefathers are ashamed of you. They didn't struggle to make it to America so that you could become a soft dick
I've known you for the past two years. You never kid about biology or alcohol.
so serious though like its almost like I'm playing a game that's my life and Im always losing
He told me to tell my ass that he loved and missed it, and even though he hasn't known it long, it might be the one for him
You're only young once, and once you get old, you either regret all the sex you had, or you regret not having enough.
so the casino kicked my ass last night, i'm pretty sure i hit a new level of hungover....just showered with my sunglasses on because the bathroom light is too bright
i have a strong feeling that today will be a naked day for me...i don't feel like doing shit
Sorry I steam cleaned at 1:30 in the morning and that i'm such a drunk dumb child. On the bright side, my carpet has ever looked better.
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
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