is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
totally got the gold medal for the best fence jump when the cops came.
and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
I will also be strapping forties to the puppies.
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
Also I just took a shit at a bar so always remember that ANYTHING is possible.
drunk freshman in the bathroom puking keeps saying "i'm a peasant" over and over
i was so high i thought the horse on my poster was running
THIS IS NOT A DECISION I MADE AT ONE IN THE MORNING IM JUST GETTING AROUND TO TELLING YOU ABOUT IT NOW
You knocked on your freshman year room door, told the kids who opened it "I own you", and attempted to force-feed them everclear.
I was gonna make a strong case for you to be my midnight kiss, but poptarts sound good too
JB just got pulled over and I am in the trunk...... this isnt good
You wouldn't eat with utensils. You insisted on making your own spoon out of a bendy straw and staples while singing "I'm a survivor" by Destiny's Child.
My arm is completely dead, never again will i give you a 20 minute hand job. You better have enjoyed that asshole. I have to text with my left hand now.
Randomize
