Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
I'm so in the Halloween spirit, I zombified my all of my nudes on my phone. Tell me this isn't creative.
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
Looks like a took a video of myself beating off and passed out last night. I'm classy.
no, but he did start crying. who the fuck is 30, covered in tattoos and crys about an ex? get your shit together, man.
I take pride in being a married 31 year old who sleeps on her best friend's bathroom floor from time to time.
Talking to him sober hurts my brain
"I'm not drinking any more tonight." As I dipped my quesadilla in a shot of tequila....then eats it
She had a tattoo of Luke Bryan on her thigh and she made me waffles. Can I have two fiancees?
I don't know if the puke on my pants is mine or not
i'm so glad to be in bed i'd like to thank the acadermy
Is this because I accidentally peed on you?
I am drunk and aggressive about the olympixs
It's spelled Olympics
But once you are just right and I work my tongue in the right spots and hot wax your balls and inner thighs. I will have you right where I want you.
Who is this?
Oops wrong number
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