K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
Do u think I can claim pregnancy as an accident so my insurance covers it?
sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
Reason #437 to hate Louisiana: Just went to the public bathroom at work. It was so humid the toilet seat was damp and sticky. Either it's the humidity or I sat in somebody's yesterday piss. I choose to believe the humidity.
I cannot believe you needed a note to remind yourself to ask me about the fourteen sleeping Mexicans.
Your remote is drenched in lotion and you expect me to believe you weren't masturbating?!
Its okay I walked into your house, searched for my wallet in your purse, and took a shot of Tequilia all without eye contact, right?
i refuse to hook up with a girl that looks like drew carey.
low point in my life last night. licked pizza grease off my iphone screen..
I am slightly proud of the fact his mom turns on the dryer located behind the spare bedroom EVERY time we visit!
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
We were having sex in the gardens when the grounds keeper walked up on us. He gave me a thumbs up and walked away
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
I find nice boys who are in extremely long term relationships with nice girls, wait for them to break up, and sneak in for the rebound fucking.
You are like a terrifying jaguar of sex. Predatory.
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
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