just got my tax refund and at bell. how do you say i want a grand worth of 5 layer burritos in spanish?
A relator touring our house this week saw the picture in our bathroom of steven passed out, yellow faced, with BALLS on his forehead, and had to ask "if that kid was alive or dead".
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
now that we've slept with the entire soccer team i think its time to expand the horizon.
I'm sorry. I think I have multiple personalities. Or it was the acid. Either way. I'm sorry.
These shoes are like walking on sunshine and labias. So soft and squishy
remind to leave next time the words "tequila" and "challenge" are shouted
Just watched an entire Mariachi band walk of shame home together. Halloween at its finest
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
Yeah I mean I think I need to stop living off of snacks and alcohol
He just stopped in the middle of undressing for sex to dip his slice of pizza in ranch. I think I’m in love.
Lost and found: pink cotton underwear next to my bed and soaking wet Reebok socks or boxers in a plastic bag...in my fridge🤔
How bad is it that I can say that this isn't the first time a married man, who is in the military, has tried to make me his mistress?
Apparently my hair turned out really good because I got my butthole licked by a stranger last night
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
Randomize
