We need to rekindle our bromance
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
Ok I won't set anything on fire if you wear pants all night. This is a bet we're both destined to lose.
Don't ask how, but I'm pretty sure my name is now on a lease to a taco bell franchise in maryland...
You know you're deprived when the only thing you taste while chewing gum is the 2 grams of sugar alcohol.
it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.
A kid in my class brought a George Foreman and cooked food mid lecture. When the prof found out, all the kid did was ask if he wanted some.
I'm expecting you to come by soon and a magical night of sex and floating on clouds to follow.
Lets play hurricane shelter. And the shelter is my bed, and we forgot our clothes.
Totally forgot Mike has only one ball. Is it sad I'm excited to see it? Or shall I say the lack of it?
omg this is getting ridiculous. nobody's vagina should ever be this neglected.
I can always see lesbian subplot. It's my hero ability.
Your cousin just directly asked you for nudes
I told him I want him to read me my Miranda rights while he's fucking me. Act exactly like he does while he's on duty except with his dick out.
He forgot how to sit. we had to pick him up and set him down.
Randomize
