Definitely just saw the guy I went on a date with Friday night dressed in medeival knight gear on the quad preparing for battle. Oh my God.
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
My therapist is concerned about your alcoholism.
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
Saved a life and got us a free vacuum cleaner (and learned vacuum is not spelled "vacumn"). Get on my level.
Marshall is naming all the elements of my face. I love science nerds.
Is it bad that I've been making new friends through your vagina networking? I don't think so
She shit all over my seat. She is not allowed in my car under any circumstances. Not even with drugs. You can't forgive a shit.
you missed 2am bagpipes and my roommate looking hot as fuck in a kilt
Why are we so great
Like I'm def going to a therapist but I wouldn't change a thing about us except maybe the peeing
He's over here like "remember those pics you sent me a couple years ago? Those were hot." And I'm like "remember talking about what we were gonna name our kids a couple months ago? That was hot." Therein lies the disconnect
I don't know which is worse, the fact that his name is Kevin or the fact that he has a pornstache.
It's a shame, really, because he's got the cock of a horse... And the personality of dry toast.
Block me from your phone tonight…I need to get laid tonight. But you've been being a douchebag. So not by you. But I might call you. So block me.
WHY WOULD I COCK BLOCK MYSELF???
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