brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
Some girl in the stall next to me just yelled "fuck yes i started my period!" she came out of the stall and we high fived. who am i to judge? i do that every month.
you came back at 4am in a suit jacket and a half eaten burrito...
We convinced him to snort an altoid. We should not be allowed to drink together
I got 87 likes on my changed relationship status. It's official. I'm way more fucking awesome single.
They're mostly guys
Early bird gets the worm.
Apparently throwing balloons filled with vodka off the roof is considered terrorism.
You need a twittervention. You're better than this.
Strip mythology. Everyone wins. Most of all me.
Because the guy guy doing the drawing either wanted to bone, or wanted us to stop entering the contest. Either way, we got concert tickets so I'm cool with both scenarios.
Guess who just hooked up with a guy who was wearing a shirt from his mom's "dress up closet"?!
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
Some Romanian guy at work just told me "you come my house, we drink beer and you come make fuck with my sister"
If he's not there watching you go for it. It's been a while bro.
Found Ryan’s keys in the fridge. On my way back.
Also, tell him he missed Nathan passing out in the dryer.
Randomize
