doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
So explain to me again how you wake up next to a Brazilian model and I wake up next to a turkey sub? And a jar of grey poupon.
home. puking in laundry basket.
Just saw remains of her puke from last night on my pants.... thats got "Apology BJ" written all over it.
In all seriousness, if tomorrow night becomes a heated game of Which Ex Gets To Take The Plastered Birthday Girl Home, I'm going to bow out with my integrity intact.
Meet me at the corner of "what the fuck" and"how'd you get in my bed" in 10 minutes.
Just got home and found him passed out with his ass stuck in a Rubbermaid garbage can. He must have been like that for a few hours
I NEED TO GET TO THE PLAYGROUND. I JUST NEED TO SWING. IF I SWING MAYBE THE SMELL WILL COME OFF OF ME. I NEED TO SWING
Bro, did you watch that scooby doo porn I sent to you?
I still don't like him. I'm also filled with alcohol, so I'll revisit the statement in the morning.
all i remember is slapping you in the face with a slice of pizza while laughing maniacally.
I haven't gotten dressed in 4 days. God bless you, unemployment.
it's like he didn't even know what a vagina was
Well, you started screaming "I dont know you GO AWAY" to your mom when she was holding your hair as you threw up in her garden.
I hope no one at work can tell or smell that I have tequila in my hair and I haven't showered for days
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