I feel like my sweat is 40 proof right now
Ever have the mailman look at you like youre a chronic masterbator. I have.
how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
He left a trail of vomit straight from our dorm to the bathroom. Looks like we have our identities for the rest of the year.
OH YEAH AND FORGOT TO THANK YOU FOR THE lack of WARNING THAT HE WASN'T CIRCUMSIZED.
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
I mean he did ask and he said it's cold out but i didn't realize we were that comfortable hahaha sex is one thing but borrowing a sweatshirt?
Locking that text forever.
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
I just drove my booty call to his booty call, if that isn't spreading the love, I don't know what is.
yeah, i'm probably gonna die. still gonna be totally worth it tho
Socially acceptable to sleep in a booth in the library? Its not finals but I dunno if I can make it back to south. Too drunk.
Based on my calculations, I should be blackout by approximately 11:14pm and that's when I need you to take my phone away from me. Mkay?
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
QUIT STEALING MY PHONE AND SEXTING MY MOM!!!!
Randomize
