So I just did the walk of shame at dunkin... A lady told me me I was really dressed up and I told her I was going to a luncheon.
We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
First off: I'm drunk so fuck you. Second: you weren't a bad girlfriend. Tres: thats 3 in spanish. Number 4: fuck 3 Doors Down
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
So I ate yogurt with the back of my toothbrush. I feel like I've officially been initiated into college.
What part of "you pissed in the tent" do you not understand?
there is way too much butter on my body for this to be okay
I like that we make it a requirement to howl at the moon every time we get drunk together.
Just orgasmed in traffic. Starting to have feelings for my commute.
Dude. I'm busy doing PR for America. FOR AMERICA. Europeans think we can't handle liquor.
So apparently the only parts of last night I remember didn't actually happen.. When did vodka become a hallucinogen?
Yep if he's taking selfies he's probably on drugs again.
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
I was watchin a porno and I sware I saw that dude at the bar at applebees the other night
Randomize