I have fifteen cents in cash and 80 cents in the bank. BUT I have weed.
I'm going to listen to christmas music to trick my body into cooling off.
I don't know what happen last night but the fact that it's 9 am and I need to put my dick in something means it didn't go as planned.
She was puking in a plastic bag while cleaning where she puked on the floor. She knows how to multitask.
If it looks really sketchy and smells like burnt pizza and pot you're in the right place
Just did a slip and slide down a five story staircase in my dorm. Being an engineer is fucking awesome
you really cant fit homeless dj into your budget? doubles as charity
he's definitely still old enough to be your dad. even your grandfather, if you come from a line of juvenile delinquents
He stumbled into my room, flopped on my bed, shoes on my pillow and asked me for a juice box. Then fell asleep with the juice box on his forehead.
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
I AM HANGING OUT WITH ADORABLE DOGS SURROUNDED BY NATURE. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND ALSO BYE CIVILIZATION AND PANTS.
Are you at a park?
Ohhh the usual. Laying in bed reflecting on my decisions
1st date with cop went weird. He yelled at me & we had a horrible date. Walking to the car I tripped & started bleeding & then he made out with me. Is it wrong that I want to see him again?
THIS IS WHY YOU NEED THERAPY!
Well, I ruined his toilet and he's still completely okay with me. Plus, it took him like a week to tell me.
If a girl I didn't love ruined my toilet I don't think I'd stick around.
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
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