Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
We even fucked WHILE he was making me breakfast in bed.
If my boyfriend wants to eat his own jizz after masturbating, what does that make him?
I make my boyfriend pay for half of my birth control. We call it his monthly rent.
What. The. Fuck. No, you will not spank me.
That wasn't intended for you, my bad.
i watched you ride a mechanical penis. nothing is awkward between us anymore.
Would it be weird if I told you I thought of you when I masturbated?
Looks like I'm more than just your Mexico mistake...
What shirt can I wear out that says 'I may have a broken arm, but it's not the one I give handjobs with'?
You'd be surprised how many calories hedonism burns.
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
It's just not a Friday night unless I'm getting propositioned by a guy in a wheelchair via Facebook messenger...
I can not say for certain that I did not blow someone in the bathroom at the bar at some point.
I feel like these arent even my fingers anymore
I have a mild substance abuse problem, but I'm still a functioning member of society. America.
Randomize
