Im at strip club and am horny
Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
we couldnt tell if he was gay so we started working glee quotes into the conversation to see if he noticed.
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
But here's the wonderful thing about us. It's us. You could invite me over, get really wasted and end up sleeping with someone else and id be there in the morning to take you to breakfast.
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
I've decided to give up hard drugs for the rest of the year.
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
His wedding band got caught on my nipple ring and that's how I realized he was married
Its just akward. Everytime he tells me he loves me, I have to respond with, I love having sex with you. and he just stares at me in amazement
I was taking this cougar home in the middle of the night I walked across the hall all naked to take a piss and ran into to some chick from highschool she said no way you are fucking my mom ran into her moms room and started yelling at her
I wanna get to the point where I can just send a question mark and get an exclamation point in response
Your slutty phase was the highlight of my year.
I deleted your number after I found out you gave my brother head for drugs.
Randomize