She celebrated a negative pregnancy test by going out to Quizno's. I really don't understand her at all.
Puking in one of the stalls, a guy ran in and started puking in the other stall... In between heaves we told each other our names; i found out that it was my old best friend that moved away in the 8th grade
It was some time between the gurgles of her blowing me to us throwing up in the same bucket afterwards that I realized we would be doing this a lot.
regular news: took many shots of tequila.....bad news: woke up with a toothbrush and vagisil next to me.....good news: clean as a whistle
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
he quoted the bible to break up with me
Ohhh. Its been awhile. Vending machine hotel condoms are $15 here who can afford to not get herpes?
Immediate regret. She's like a chihuahua on crack.
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
Donald Trump looks like someone photoshopped hair onto a dick pic.
Tears For Fears is the only thing getting me through life at this moment.
I'm still not sure how to feel about the fact that we had a threesome with a guy the same age as my dad
So after we found out he wasnt throwing up blood in was just hawaiian punch and we all failed breathalyzers the cop drove us around like a taxi and brought us back to the apartment
i solemnly vow to never stick my penis into crazy again
I give it a week.
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