let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
Phosphoglyceraldehydration... why the fuck is this a word
The guy I was getting with last night took off his purity ring mid-sex and threw it across the room.
winter break is gonna be like a weird mixture of rehab fat camp and holiday cheer.
it was a weeks worth of wine for $20. it would have been fiscally irresponsible to not buy it.
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
The lady at Walgreens was all excited my pregnancy tests had a coupon.
Well, thats the first guy to go to jail because of my vagina
Post that event on your timeline
I'm curious as to what my outfit choices drunk me made for this weekend.
I might stash a bottle of vodka in your mailbox, that way if I wanna leave early I can drink in your frontyard till you get back.
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
Go makeout with Mickey Mouse so we can get FastPass tickets
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
Why do I have a separate credit card just for booze? Because I saved enough points so Saturday we are flying to Denver to smoke legal weed and fly back in the same day.
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
Randomize
