I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
He keeps apologizing for not being able to get hard when he's drunk. We havent even left the club yet.
i would rather give Shaq a handjob than take this accounting final
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
I picked her up for our first date on a fucking horse. Of course I got a BJ.
should my penis look like a turkey
Why is there bacon braided in my hair
I'm by the dj to the left. Come get me now this girl is talking about baby names and I dnt even no hers
I can't see you
I'm the only one that's wearing a tarzan outfit get your ass over here you douche
Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
Oh fuck, I messaged a Jack Kerouac poem to a girl I'm trying to sleep with last night at 4am.
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
Human centipede...with the teletubbies. That's what my nightmare had in it.
I don't even want to know.
Are you planning on wandering into construction sites drunk and falling down 6' holes?
probably
You've lost booty call privileges between the hours of 10pm and 8am.
Randomize
