Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
He just washed his hands with scrubbing bubbles yelling "They work hard so I don't have to!"
I don't know, I don't really wanna ask the question, "Mom why am I not circumcised?"
I just need to go to a bar tonight wrapped in an American flag singing the national anthem
So basically he tried to get out of the car and crawl on the highway with the broken leg because he didn't want to go to the hospital. It was not a good time...then we got pizza though.
I feel like I just tasted lung cancer.
Drunk Jeff aka Dreff thinks he's about 3x cooler than be really is and about 100x better at dancing than he really is
I was so gone I thought the cops banging on my door were kids from the party trying to get into my room... needless to say, I started moaning louder so they would take the hint.
So, I'm a little drunk in Seattle with Glenna, but we've all agreed that it's patriotic to think about Bill Clinton from time to time during sex. 'Merica
For me the most fucked up part of last night was that I know for a fact that you were sober. But your dancing was a close second.
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
drunk and crying about Shakespeare- how's your night?
I woke up on a different floor than I went to sleep on. Can't find my shoes.
I am afraid of asking him for his new number so I continue to text the one that's no longer in service.
I love how fuckboys immediately become cultured when I tell them I’m an artist.
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