We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
Apparently as I was doing the walk of shame home my dad's date was on her way to hers. hoes come in all ages these days
I just watched dragonflies fucking. You can't match that level of geek.
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
That bar is one yeast infection away from total annihilation.
Well I'm in the bathtub smoking a bowl and eating doritos and frosting so I might not be the one to advise you on this shit but I'll try.
So you told me to remind you that you vomited 3 times in the street because you would forget so here is your reminder
My sister just showed me a snap chat that I don't remember sending, it was a picture of me with two big macs in my bra with just the words "BURGER TITS"
"I licked someones beard, because I can."
According to the arrest report, I shouted "no, YOU put some pants on" at the cop. Downhill from there.
From the bottom of my heart, thanks for never sending me unsolicited dick picks.
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
I kept my extra Molly pill in my wallet in the change part, that's also where I keep my body jewelry while I'm working. The nose ring punctured the pill essentially coating itself in MDMA. My nose ring is back in my nose. This could be entertaining
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