I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
I got so high that I decided to drive with my knees on the way home. Where am I going in life?
Nowhere
quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
he gets drunk and then tries to eat the lasers at the dance club
He just walked up to be, grabbed my boob and said 'i think they have shrunk' i have no idea who he was.
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
I don't know man, I woke up and shes here acting like she knows me, wearing my clothes, and scrambling eggs in my kitchen. I don't know her.
You were drinking with me last night, I warned you.
You know the sex was good when he had to ask which way was north before he left.
I came in like 30 seconds, and my dog got to watch me take the walk of shame to the bathroom to clean up. All in all, not my best performance.
I'm not dealing with this wiskey dick shit, 2016 is the year of hard dicks
The only thing that makes a night with half a bottle of cheap vodka is the other half of that bottle of cheap vodka.
Dude, exfoliate your balls. you'll thank me later.
I didn’t want to see that boob. I told her not to show me but she said “no, I’m going to show you”
Randomize
