she lunged for my junk like it was the cure for swine flu
He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
If there was chocolate on Regis Philban's dick, I would totally lick it off. That's how desperate I am for some right now.
You should come over. I am making a celebratory I got laid by a huge penis cake.
Almost accidentally stole a baby... explain later
Sundays have taken on a whole new meaning when I'm not in bed with an excruciating hangover.
You're just mad at the fact that I want to be a car alarm.
double majoring has taught me only that psych majors are sluttier than govt majors
Like for real, is your junk ok? I have to look after my investments.
I just watched your sister pour half a bottle of cotton candy flavored snow cone syrup into a bottle of marshmallow flavored vodka, take a swig, frown, and pour a cherry coke in.
Just wait until she offers you a "powerita"
yo dude not sure how this happened but im drunk at your house eating burritos with your mom and sister. hope you're having fun in new zealand
She had a toddler. It threw up and then some guy said party foul and put it on the porch. Going back next Friday.
I rewired his car so that every time he hits the gas the horn and the OnStar turn on every time he hits the brake the panic alarm goes off.
She demanded to see my stimulus package, I had to go over.
Randomize
