Take a Tylenol with a HUGE glass of water before you pass out, you'll thank me in the morning.
i dony have tylonal but i had a snickers and popcorn and a bottle of water and i am.. brushing my teeth!
worst hand job ever. my dick is about as raw as that sushi your mom wanted me to try.
please stop referring to my baby as "your little fucker"
Its officially tradition: I black out every year on michael jackson's death day..
Excused from finishing the term project because my lab partner got arrested. For the second year in a row. Public school, I love you.
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
Bring single women, or taken women who are unhappy with their relationships, or women who are happy with their relationships but have low moral standards, or women who just like to remove clothing when drunk (relationship status is unimportant for this option)
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
I don't know what that means. But if you take off your pants, you'll probably get arrested.
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
I feel like you're gonna be reading this at 6 AM in a ditch or under a bridge, but please remember...I offered to drive you home. And you said no.
The sad thing is that it's 6:45 and you're not far off.
Just wiped the ashes off my forehead before he came over to have sex. Definitely going to hell.
And god said thou shalt never deny free booze. And it was good.
Randomize
