Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
I just woke up to crumpled tissues everywhere. Looks like it was another night filled with tears and semen.
I hate fucking guys that don't drink coffee. My morning hangover and shame will not be cured by your stupid tea.
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
Dude sorry but it totally wasn't worth going back in there for yous shoes
Hope you had your fill for the summer my friend, because all the cleavage has been put away for the winter. Fear not; it blooms again in May.
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
Happy birthday, you long dick monster
I shouldn't be that hard, but i cant exactly put "a guy to tie me up and fuck me and then brush my hair" in my dating profile
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
Novelty of the week: Getting my lipstick back in an evidence bag
What the hell happened to the sandwich meat I just bought?
After you smoked, you made 8 ham sandwiches.
Guess that explains the mysterious disappearance of the bread...
all I want for my birthday is booze and sex toys. don't bother calling if neither of those are included.
Randomize
