Alex texted me. Bootycall boy #2. its like an alarm goes off once i'm single that the line is open again
the next time i see a chick with leggings under her jean skirt...i'm gona beat her ass with a fashion magazine...
sticking your finger down your throat to make yourself throw up is bulimia, not morning sickness, so no, I don't think you're pregnant.
just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
Passing out during sex is actually quite pleasant. its like being rocked to sleep with a penis
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
The house is trashed, there is porn scattered everywhere like an easter egg hunt and the blow up doll is sleeping on the couch downstairs. someone covered her up.
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
You know its going to be a good day when you have to brush your teeth out of a cup in your room using the vodka and water mixture in your fridge because you're locked out of your restroom
No! Last time I got hit with a beer bottle
Haha, Tuesday man
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
This guy dressed as a piece of paper for Halloween, I felt it was only necessary to sign his penis
Let's put a bunch of beers in a backpack and shotgun them in a Red Lobster bathroom
DICK-CITY HERE WE COME
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