Do you think Capital One would let me put the Tub Girl picture on my Capital One card?
Beat you to it.
Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
Just assessed the damage in the bath. Two love bites. One bruise on the inner thigh. Strange awareness of what i'm assuming is my cervix. I've definitely missed you. x
Now there are two cop cars. If I go to jail I just would like to thank you for making me wear boxers.
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
Every once in a while you'd chuckle to yourself, and when I asked you what's so funny u replied "sometimes my toes tickle eachother"
I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser.
He fucked me so hard I might have to go to the hospital for internal bleeding
Can I have him when you're done?
She did my hair, then ate me out. Switching teams was an awesome decision.
idk man, I was fucked up and eating fried rice at the grocery store, tried to wave at her but she just looked concerned at me.
You know its an epic night when omar the garbage man gives you a ride home at 6 in the morning.
Oh god, I forgot we had sex to Elton John
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
My ovaries melted while we were talking. I almost told him I would suck his soul out through his dick
That would be a memorable parent teacher conference for sure
Want to go to Victoria’s Secret? His fiancée is out of town and I’m going to try and stop the wedding with lingerie and lots adventurous sex
Absolutely! I love a good sexual filibuster!
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