Yeah. My legs are trembling...hard to walk. Feels like a neon arrow is pointing at me saying "just had sex (with not his wife)"
he ran me a hot bath. i thought i was in a pot and was going to be eaten. i was strangely ok with this
Babe when I told you that you needed to grow up I didn't mean get drunk and sponsor 8 African kids.
Hefty paycheck and not get wasted can't exist in the same night
U know that drunk state, where at 930 the next morning your sitting in a bath in ur bathing suit trying to sober up...yeah. That's where i am..
my friend thinks you're hot & wants to fuck you ps i'm my friend
I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?
He peed in the bird bath. Those birds are gonna be pissed
You pulled out a fucking recorder and started playing along with all the songs on your playlist and refused to hit the j
I just bought a bong from a hot dog stand.
Sorry you had to clean the sheets with your macro notes
I thought I was bad, the girl next to me on the bench was feeding a bush a hamburger and introduced me. Only at lollapalooza.
I'm going to blow a ton of money on sex toys just so I can tell you to do better than them.
So I come home this morning to get ready for a job interview and there is garlic seasoning all over the hardwood and a knife in the wall. What. the. fuck.
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
Randomize
