Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
TBS has betrayed me by telling me tyler perry is funny
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
Just had to have the guy at Sprint clear the dried cum out of the trackball on my Blackberry. Wonder if that happens to him often.
fyi gin and iced coffee...not my greatest invention
She fell out the car soaking wet and screaming "im wearing a fedora!" then tryed to seduce him on the front lawn in front of his middle aged neighbor
The last party at your house was a sex toy party...it's an obvious transition to baby shower
my mom just left...time to break out that water bottle of wine that I sewed into my teddy bear
I considered my 2012 starting right when the cop followed the wrong car for the bottle rocket we shot at him
He ate me out in the forest at that park we used to hit my bong in highschool again, somehow this isn't what I pictured being 25 would be like
Would "deck the halls with penises " be an appropriate event title? I know peni is the plural but flow of the tongue as well
I vaguely remember seeing that couple making out in front of that store and i yelled "I ALSO LOVE THE ROCKY MOUNTAIN SOAP COMPANY!"
We should just do therapy together, clearly we have all the same issues. It's why we are friends.
You know the sex was good when he had to ask which way was north before he left.
If you think eating a bowl of leftover stuffing and drinking champagne from the bottle in dirty sweats at 9am is sexy... Then yeah, I'm your girl.
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