i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
connan obrien reminds me of an asparagus spear
Plus she can make a mean sandwich! That's all I really need. Well that and foot jobs...
he was gone before i woke up. left a pee stain, phone number, note and $20 for sheets. safe to say i will not be calling.
She wasn't to happy when she went to put her shirt on and it was covered in cum I just looked at her and said collateral damage....
I was standing when I hit it. I barely made it to the couch before the walls started turning into people.
Is it wrong in Austin to talk to the homeless while I feed a bird my chips??
I dropped my blunt out the window of a moving car by accident, tell me everything will be okay
Witnessing a crazy lady on the bus screaming about how romney is one of the four horsemen of the apocalypse.
She's like a solid nine. Well maybe not a tomorrow morning nine, but she's a nine right now and trying to take me home.
Dude come to her party. Someone just took a body shot of rubbing alcohol
I had to get my boss birth control a work today. I knew going to ASU would come in handy in my career someday.
I mean, don't most people have like a two week grace period where it's okay to ditch new friends?
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
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