thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
it was so cute when you were pretending to have willpower
i had just passed the point of no return when my mom opened my door. I hid my dick and took the porn off the computer in time but i still had to explain my day at school to her WHILE i was jizzing in my pants.
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
Just puked in the monkey exhibit at the zoo. They ate it. I don't want a pet monkey anymore.
After skinny dipping in your pond, I think me and tequila have added a whole new dynamic to our relationship.
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
I literally just wrote "I'm sorry" in my blue book, got up and walked out
I stole so many things from the ER last night.
Everyone looked at me like I just fucked a gopher and was wearing it like a hat
I came home wearing somebody's thong. If you're missing one message me privately.
i dont know whats worse..that i woke up in a gorilla suit or that its covered in peanut butter
I think John will remember that birthday for a while. I'm still dying at the fact a stripper was hunting me down.
I woke up and my pants were in the kitchen but my shoes were next to my bed. Do the math...
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