Well douche your snatch and let's go!
I just realized that all of my cardio comes from dancing on tables.
We ran out of toilet paper the last week, so we just took showers to pee
If it was designed to hold water, it was designer to hold wine
we couldn't find any funnels so we taped a spaghetti strainer to a pool noodle and it worked fairly well
The cops knocked on our door just to ask us if we were really having a no-pants party.
I bought a sword. Make the proper arrangements.
he just sat there, in the doorway of my dorm room, chuggin a fifth like nobodys buisness.. don't know whether to fuck him or be afraid of his confidence
Trying to figure out what I just puked. Demon weed is salad. No more drunk buffets.
I'm sorry you're hurting. Would a picture or my erect penis help?
Last night was great... In the "I got videotaped making out and getting a handjob on the couch in front of 100 people." kinda way.
Accent: check. Hot body: check. 8" dick: check. Feeds me biscuits in bed after rampant sex: check. Should I continue with my "Why I'm not coming back to the States" List?
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
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