i sleep in a fine layer of vodka and semen. i don't know that that would appropriate for a pajama rally.
Just got a script for 120 vicodin with 6 refills. I feel like michael jackson.
I could make treat bags
I'm guessing "whatever I can get" wasn't the reply the nurse wanted when asking what med I need. Oh, and asked for a cartoon band-aid.
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
It was pretty bad. Like cum-on-my-face-while-singing-Let-It-Snow bad.
If I had really thought it through, I would have bought some Depends, popped one on and made this night my bitch.
passed out in the hallway last night, now I'm sitting down in the shower, eating lukewarm canned soup out of Tupperware, listening to Carly rae jepsen.. I had a rough night.
Bullets don't scare me. I wish I was a coyote
Sitting on the toilet ... Eatin pizza with one hand, petting my cat with the other. I love a sad drunken life
we need to tell them stories about when happens when we're sober so they think they know what they're in for when they're actually completely unprepared for whn happens when we get drunk
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
Bruh why you gotta judge
You're awake at 3:30 in the morning RSVPing to a musical, I'm well within my means
Something I never want to forget. I'm in a porta potty and she is outside knocking on the door going "You're a queen. You're a queen. Never think any different"
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
Randomize
