Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
New Jersey isn't a real state, it's just a myth you tell little kids to scare them like Canada or Carrot Top
lesson learned: don't narrate out loud about how a girl is giving you head while she's doing it
do you think I can still get an erection if I donate blood today? this is important.
After the second day the hotel realized I wasn't responsible enough to have a comforter, so they took it for the rest of the trip.
She gave me head because I gave her my pack of cigarettes...And you said quitting would be hard.
I can't tell you details but at one point I had her pee strapped to my back in a ziploc
My vag has a bald spot. That is so middle aged. Is this my midlife crisis?
It's like being the highest you've ever been, then doing about 20 shots, and chasing them with lines of coke. All while laying on the surface of the sun.
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
he drank all my beer while i was at work and passed out on my couch, when i got home he was out cold and my room mates pig was licking him. they seemed peaceful, so i took 20 bucks from his wallet and left again.
I'm ordering sushi and crying over finals. Come over and bring wine.
Hey! Happy Birthday! Could you do me a favor and bring my underwear to the bar?
Also this morning I remembered seeing the stripper he threw up on later in the night. She was clothed though.
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