remember facepaint boy? turns out it stains. aaaand i have it all over my face and neck.
So I used to make fun of texas a lot, then I got here and I found a place where I could get my tequila in a to go cup with a straw and I realized that this is the only place I ever want to be
Drunkenly auctioned off my bed for 3 tequila shots
I already apologized. And I got cum in my eye in return, I say your night beats mine...
I think I pulled my groin stumbling back from the bar. That or the hippo I woke up next to.
I have Retrograde Ejaculation as a side effect from one of my meds. Is this a respectable form of birth control?
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
He was spooning with the dog when I came home. Now shes afriad to go near him. Should I ask?
He's practically not my boyfriend anymore. So let's go get some glitter, balloons, alcohol and forget this night ever happened.
Home-made laxative recipe: activia yogurt and tequila shots. Any ratio ought to work.
She is dumping me if she doesn't get a ring by Valentines. So one more month of free sex and it will be back to the right hand.
i think we sleep fucked last night...
ok first of all what the fuck
Bachelorette party buss just rolled into down town. DTF, "horny hotties inside" and "show us your dicks" written on the windows....this could get interesting.
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