Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
The best was having to tell my 16y/o cuz and her bf that we could see him fingering her in the inner tube. Lucky for them, I'm the cool cousin... and was river-level fuckedup.
Sunburnt clitoris. How do I deal with it.
he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
No, I didn't like him that much. But I took one for the team. And by the team I mean me and my vagina.
thank you TLC waking up to a water birth on tv really put the cherry on top of my hangover...
I'm texting you the word "cockring" because I feel it hasn't been said enough throughout our friendship.
Well when I got home you were sitting at the table eating cold, leftover taco meat. I'd say you were pretty far gone by that time.
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
Holy shit, add "successfully got stoned secretly at a party where a cop was" to my list of accomplishments.
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
For me the most fucked up part of last night was that I know for a fact that you were sober. But your dancing was a close second.
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
DO NOT FUCK YOUR ENGAGED GAY NEIGHBOR!
I wanted to make my beer stronger so I poured vodka in it. Why god....why
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