If the pens lose tonight I'm gonna drive to Detroit and burn 8 mile to the ground.
Actually I may do that regardless. Probably get my own holiday.
just saw a dude in a v-neck sweater on a bike drinking starbucks. way to feed the stereotypes white dude.
I just used a franzia box to scrape the snow off my car.
I puked walking onto the plane. How do you think my post-Birthday hangover went?
I just find it funny that nobody ever threatens to call the cops on us until we have a Harry Potter party
I have this terrible fear I might accidentally text a pic of my dick to my grandma
I'm dressed in all sequins still at 9:30 in the morning and the worst part is that I actually still fit in in Vegas
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
I'll truly miss your penis but your use of words and phrases such as bae, yolo, swag, and totes have ruined how attractive you once were.
Asking me to suck on my nipples isn't going to make me less mad at you.
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
it's a rainbow of FUCK YOU
There's a dude wearing a banana suit at the house across the street....
DID YOU OR DID YOU NOT, PEE IN MY FUCKING TRASHCAN?!
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
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