I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
You must have had one hell of a time explaining to that girl why aladin soundtrack was playing on repeat in your room when you got back
I feel like my life has just been one 21 year long episode of "i shouldn't be alive"
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
Let's go get our ovaries removed together. It'll be like bonding by getting mani/pedis, but with more vicodin and less unwanted pregnancies.
............HELP Ive been abducted by vodka and its poisoning my brain fat chicks are getting cute and i slept with my sisters friend who slightly resembles john kerry....,,help
Chill out, I'm getting ready as fast as I can. I didn't even masturbate in the shower.
Honestly, it's his loss. He went for the free sample when he could've gotten the whole package, babes.
does that make me the free sample at the grocery store he didn't like enough to buy...? yeah, that advice didn't help, but thanks.
Lets get coked out and steal a parrot this summer
I'm stoned as hell watching the new Star Trek movie. My life is 110% better than it was an hour ago.
What the World Series means to me is that I've slept with too many giants fans.
Randomize