When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
I'm constantly one strobe light away from an E flashback
My recently uploaded pictures to facebook: Me partying on Beale St. with a single girl on each arm. Ex's recently upload pictures: Several pictures of cats. I win.
I got an MIP via FUCKING HELICOPTER. Tuscaloosa police either have nothing to do or too many resources.
i mean i should have known that when i started taking shots with my zumba instructor i was in for a rough night...
Things you owe me: a sober apology, $12, the removal of bbq sauce from my doorknob
I.V.'s should just be available for purchase at Walmart. God I'm dehydrated.
Some guy wearing a horse mask just knocked on my door and started whinnying. I opened the door and he was like, "...oh sorry, wrong room..." so awk.
Oh, and i love you too. Im just a selfish dick who had to talk about myself first
He picked up a chick with a line about the price of used cars in Sri Lanka and developing economies. Step it up.
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
i have never been so sexually frustrated as I am right now. I feel like dying...is death an option?
Did you take the full box of samoas or do I not remember getting baked and eating half a box by myself?
I'm kinda sad I'm leaving the bank. I never got to have rough sex in the vault.
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when I get back.
Randomize
